Sometimes insight comes not through words, but through smell. With me, it happened when I smelt the soft, warm tone of oud bergamot. Not the fresh energy of something new, but the depth of something that has lived. It touched me, precisely because of that recognition. I thought about how hospitality works. Of how often we focus on what is visible: the sign, the room, the smile. Whereas real attention is in what you can't point to; the atmosphere you feel as soon as you step inside. A smell. A tone. A voice that rings true.
In influence psychology, they call this resonance: that moment when something outside you, touches something inside you. It starts with a stimulus, a smell, a look, a tone, but it doesn't stick until it touches something deeper: trust, connection, safety, freedom. In that moment, you no longer need to judge or compare. You know it's right. We respond not to what shouts the loudest, but to what resonates most with who we are.
Values make themselves felt through our senses. A smell can evoke safety, a tone can inspire confidence, a touch can bring connection. Animals instinctively respond to such stimuli, but we add something to them: meaning. What resonates is not the stimulus itself, but the meaning embedded in it.
The smell of lived-in influence
n hospitality, I experience it every day. A guest remembers not what you said, but how it felt. A colleague remembers not the words, but the tone in which you spoke. That is resonance in action. The soft power of influence with meaning.
Oud bergamot, for me, is the symbol of that power. Of attention that lingers, even when the moment has passed. Of renewal that takes root in what was already there.
Anyone who steps into Onder de Linden may recognise it immediately. That soft, warm scent mixing with wood, coffee and memory. Not by chance, but chosen. Because it suits who we have become. Not sparkling new, but warm, familiar and moving.
For me, that is the essence of growth: not constantly innovating to be different, but deepening to stay true.
The invitation
Learning for me feels like smelling old bergamot. You open something familiar, but keep discovering new layers. It takes time, attention and curiosity. Exactly what true hospitality also requires. My journey in influence psychology makes me feel that growth is not about learning new tricks, but about understanding more deeply what really touches people. About spontaneity, genuineness, togetherness, sociability, intimacy, connection and trust. Values that give meaning to every experience: in smell, in tone, in humanity. Everyone writes their own story. Maybe this is the time to open your next chapter.
Feel free to browse in at Onder de Linden in Roden and experience what the magic of attention feels like. A story you won't want to slam shut again, as a guest, as a listener, as a human being.
"Attention is not an extra. It is the experience. The core. The magic."
